Saturday, February 28, 2004

Two journal entries in one day!

It can only mean one thing: too much caffeine. Whatever, you may ask, would be the reason for my increased intake of my caffeinated beverage of choice, tea? Why the reason is clear, I may respond (if you may ask, I may respond) as water. Trump Ice spring water. I am a big fan of "The Apprentice," Trump's reality show pitting CEO wannabes against each other in a "Survivor" like situation; the show is even produced by Mark Burnett, the guy who started Survivor.

In the last episode, the apprentice-hopefuls were given the task of selling Trump Ice bottled water. I have to say I thought it was utterly ridiculous that this guy's mug with THAT HAIR was on a bottle of water. His hair by the way, is not a comb-over. He is thinning right on top, but he has hair in the front so it is more of a comb-back than a comb-over. I know this because I caught some of The Donald on Larry King Live (which is a misnomer because as we all know Larry King has long been Dead, stuffed not all that skillfully and animated like a marionette with sticks and strings. I think they also somehow get the scent of alcohol breath to come out of his mouth, deepening the illusion for the guests).

Anywho, that morning I had been in Gristede's and saw that it was really for sale. This fact managed somehow to elude the producers and researchers on Larry's show since whoever is doing Larry's voice asked Trump if Trump Ice was a real product. Well, duh, I thought, I just bought some today. What's on those cards Larry has anyway?

I decided to try it, as they mentioned on The Apprentice that it had very low mineral content, and if you remember my post from January 1st of this year where I was discussing the qualties of various different kinds of bottled water with which to make tea taste better, low mineral content sounded pretty good.

The taste test revealed that Trump Ice, at least for me, makes a brisk, bright cup of tea; sec but not enough to make your lips pucker. In short, the best damn tea making water I have tasted yet. I'm pretty sensitive to caffeine, yet five cups of this delectable elixir today. What a delight!

What a jaw gnashing, eye ball bulging, dehydrating delight! It is clear to me that I will never sleep tonight which means I'll probably end up on the couch watching reruns of Larry King Dead vowing not to drink more than three cups tomorrow. Any more than that and I might end up with a comb-back of my own.

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Today I watched some Jehovah's Witnesses or some other kind of evangelistic group go from one of these stately old homes to another across the street from our apartment.

I noticed them first at House #1, which they didn't know is actually part of House #2, but you wouldn't know that unless you sat and watched who came in and went out. (Kiss my ass; I've had some time on my hands and our dining table sits in front of the window, 'K?) There were four of them; two women and two guys, though the women looked more like girls and the one guy was I think about 7 or 8.
Notice in the picture how he's got a little kid sized briefcase; I'd also like to add that when I snapped this he was doing a little goose step that you can't fully appreciate in this shot.
Anyway, they were taking turns going up to the houses in pairs by gender. The two males spent about 10 minutes at House #1, both knocking on the wooden door and ringing the bell (unbelievably, it is one single family that lives in these two joined houses; that's about a $10MM house right there!) and the kid even tried the knob! When they didn't have any luck at the front door, they went around to the side of the stoop and tried knocking on the basement door. The girls are on the sidewalk and making frantic notes when they see someone going into House #4. The girls then went up to House #2 and rang and rang and knocked and knocked, but no answer there either. After a total of about 10 minutes on Houses 1 and 2 they "gave up," making little notes of the address or something in little books and going on to House #3.

It was the guys' turn again, and they stepped up to the challenge, using the knocking/ringing combo again while the girls looked up from the street at the windows trying to detect any signs of life.

Then they came to House #4. The girls took turns ringing the bells and knocking, and, wonder of wonders, the door opened! It was this lady. The door closed again pretty quickly. The girls would not be ignored. They continued to ring other bells in the building, and roused
this dog.
Apparently, the old lady was taking care of the guy on the second floor's dog, cause I saw her come to the window of the second floor and try to get the dog, (who my husband and I have taken to nicknaming because he is at the window all the time and like I said our table where we eat looks right out the window, "Button-nose-dog") to shut up. So they keep ringing the bell and Button-nose-dog keeps barking and the old lady keeps walking over and looking down on the street to see, oh, I don't know, if it is the same annoying people ringing the bell, or if someone else like Girl Scouts or a brush salesman has appeared and begun to ring the bell instead, and then trying to shush Button-nose-dog. But he won't be shushed and they keep ringing the damn bell! I can't believe what I am seeing and it is at this point, already a good 20 minutes into this saga that I get my camera out and start snapping. They won't give up, they've seen a live person, and they even are putting their ears to the door to hear, oh, I don't know, if the woman has changed her mind and now wants to hear about how Jesus died for her sins, or someone else that lives there is going to answer the door instead.

Just a moment or two after I shot picture of them with the kid goosestepping, (perhaps on their way to catch the new Jesus flick that's out now), the old lady came out of her house. I have to hand it to her; I might have been afraid to venture out so soon afterward and take the chance, oh, I don't know, of being approached by them again, or having my picture taken by someone across the street with some time to kill and an online journal.

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